The Prologue: A Northern Soul Born Under the Arizona Sun
On a sun-drenched Arizona day, the fifteenth of August in the year 2025, a future King of the North, a rare and sought-after solid cream Maine Coon drew his first breath within the royal halls of DLuxxy. His proud father, Sorbus, of legendary lineage, surveyed his heir with immense satisfaction. His noble mother, Garnet, though wearied from her labor, devoted herself utterly to her new offspring, her devotion as fierce as a shield-maiden’s.
Luigi Sorbus Arduino: The Cream-Colored Royal Descendant
The youngest of three noble litters, yet destined for the grandest of frames, was a solid cream Maine Coon kitling whose coat was the color of a desert sunset blended with the faintest blush of rose quartz. He was a little sun-bleached lion, so uniquely and gloriously hued that the scribes of the cattery bestowed upon him the provisional name Rosy.
But a name of such gentle delicacy could never hope to contain the Viking spirit of this kitten. As the days turned to weeks, Rosy — whom we shall henceforth know by his true and proper name, Louie — did not merely grow; he flourished. He transformed into a large, truly regal and magnificently fluffy cream Maine Coon kitten, his lush, pink-tinged coat becoming a thick, opulent mantle fit for the northern prince he was born to be.
A Heart of Gold: The True Treasure of this Cream Maine Coon
Yet, the epic of Luigi Sorbus Arduino was not written in his glorious fur, but in the profound calm of his spirit. While participating in the nursery’s whirlwind of playful skirmishes and chaotic pursuits, this particular cream Maine Coon reigned over his own quiet domain. He observed the world with the placid, ancient wisdom of the fjords from which his breed hails. A purr resonated from him like a constant, soothing melody, a sound that could pacify even the most rambunctious child. He was a diplomat of cuddles and a sovereign of serenity. The humans of DLuxxy often remarked, in hushed and admiring tones, that this stunning cream Maine Coon possessed a soul of pure gold, wrapped in the most magnificent plush package.
The Call of the North: A Destiny in a Winter Kingdom
But even the most idyllic of reigns must evolve. The ancient blood of Northern explorers coursed through his veins, and a destiny awaited him in a true kingdom of winter. The call came from a city of towering spires and a great, blue lake, where the wind whispered tales of adventure — Chicago.
And so, the cream-colored prince prepared for his great journey. His magnificent coat, a gift from his northern ancestors, would now serve its true purpose…
My Great Viking Voyage (Or, How I Trained a Human)
Let it be known across the nine realms that my journey to this “Chicago” place was not by longboat, but by a rather undignified metal bird. The things I endure for my kingdom. My new human servant, “Crystal,” arrived after a lengthy quest (she calls it a “flight” and “rental car,” but I know a trial when I see one). I decided to test her devotion immediately. One look at my magnificent, plush cream Maine Coon form and she was muttering, “I’m in love.” Excellent. First lesson: complete adoration. Check.
The voyage was tedious, but a future king must inspect his new territories. I permitted her to carry me in a transparent knapsack — a mobile throne, if you will — which worked splendidly for receiving tribute in the form of gawking admiration from the common folk. She seemed distressed that I would cry if she left my sight. Obviously. A servant must remain within summoning distance at all times. It’s basic royal protocol.
On the Subjugation of the Beast, Cooper
There was a minor nuisance — a hairy, wiggling beast she calls “Cooper.” I gave him one look, a look that said, “I am tiny, fluffy, and will end you,” and he immediately understood the chain of command. He now wisely vacates whatever surface I choose to occupy. The household is, as it should be, mine.
The Coronation: A Throne Called a Sofa
After what felt like an eternity, we arrived at my new palace. It was… acceptable. The first order of business was to survey my main hall (the “living room”) from the highest peak (the “sofa”). My human chirped, “He blends in purrfectly!!” Well, of course I do. I am perfection. I simply sat, allowing my regal aura to wash over the domain, and it was so.
A Monarch’s View of the Rebellious Garden
My interior dominion firmly established, I now conduct daily inspections of the outer territories through the Great Glass Wall. It’s a vast, untamed land filled with fluttering spies (sparrows), skittering emissaries (squirrels), and falling leaves that clearly disobey my laws of gravity. I monitor it all with a critical eye, my tail twitching with strategic plans for when I finally gain access to this wild frontier. For now, I allow them to believe they are free. It amuses me.
My Reign of Purrs and Pounces
My daily schedule is now perfectly optimized. I spend my days in a royal slumber, conserving my energy. As night falls, I commence my official duties: the Midnight Crazies. This involves galloping at top speed through the halls and using my human’s feet as launching pads for my attacks. She finds this disruptive to her “sleep.” I find it essential for my training regimen.
The Royal Chest-Warming Protocol
Once I have determined she is sufficiently aware of my prowess, I take pity on her. I grace her not just with my presence, but with my full weight — directly on her chest. It is the most prestigious spot in the bed, after all, and the purrs I emit from there are scientifically proven to lull humans into a state of utter devotion. She dares not move, for she knows she is in the presence of greatness. Eventually, I may relocate to her pillow, but only when I decide the royal chest warming is complete.
A Sky Tribute: On the Matter of Snow
A recent development deserves its own chronicle: my kingdom was magically dusted in white, cold, baffling stuff. My human called it “snow” and seemed overly excited, fumbling for her camera as if witnessing a miracle. I, of course, was not baffled in the slightest. I positioned myself by the Great Glass Portal and observed this phenomenon with the keen interest of a Viking scientist. After a thorough analysis, I have determined it is clearly a tribute from the sky, meant to beautify my domain and remind everyone of my noble, northern origins. As if to prove my point, look how my magnificent coat has suddenly become even more voluminous! It is the true Maine Coon adaptation to the Nordic climate, finally being expressed in its proper environment. It’s rather fitting, really. A winter wonderland for a winter king. I have allowed my human to take photographic evidence of my approval.
It’s a demanding job, ruling this winter wasteland, but someone has to do it. And I must say, for a human, she’s shaping up quite nicely. The saga of Luigi Sorbus Arduino has only just begun, and I predict it will be filled with conquered hearts, toppled dog toys, and an endless supply of chicken. All hail.
